Pitch Battles

I think its comedian Dara O'Briain who makes reference in his stand-up act to nostalgia essentially being 'heroin for old people'; as such I am eternally wary when I write these articles of preaching any sort of 'things were better in the old days' type comment. When it comes to football grounds things certainly were not better in the old days, in comparison to today's safe and comfortable all-seater stadia. However, whilst they may not have been better in the old days, they were certainly more individualistic.

As more and more of today's football league teams move into shiny concrete bowls, dropped into retail parks, on the edges of towns and cities, complete with constant revenue streams where you are watching the game becomes of less significance. You could be at Southampton or Shrewsbury, Darlington or Doncaster, Coventry or Colchester, but for the colour of the seats and the dialect of the baseball capped personnel behind the snack-bar all are pretty interchangable.

Of course it wasn't always like this; old grounds often boasted unique characteristics that made them easily identifiable when they appeared on the television, or memorable when you visited.
On television Stamford Bridge was the oval shaped one with the blue disability cars parked between the touchline and the stands. The Dell had it's oddly shaped 'chocloate box' enclosures behind each goal. Ayresome Park had it's odd barn-like Main Stand roof whilst the Manor Ground seemed to have been pieced together from other football grounds' left-over stands. Inside old grounds you often found further architectural anomalies; for example in the final years of Doncaster's Belle Vue ground it was widely acknowledged that the best view on the Pop Side terrace came from looking through the small window above the middle urinal in the Rossington End toilets.

However, whilst this side of the border football clubs continue to embrace modern flat-pack arenas to satisfy the all-seater requirements of the top two divisions, there remains an oasis of retro football ground features in the Scottish League. Beneath the SPL exists a haven of terraces, neat archaic mains stands, and courtesy of Brechin City's Glebe Park, the coup de gras; a great big hedge. So long has the Glebe Park pitch been bordered on one side by this foliage that the club thesmelves have become intertwined with the feature and are now nicknamed the hedgemen.

However, all this could be set to change thanks to the pantomime villains of UEFA. Whilst Brechin's narrow pitch fits the criteria of the Scottish FA it is however three metres too narrow to satisfy UEFA's pitch regulations which must be met for club's to obtain licencing. As such the Scottish FA could force Brechin to adhere to those regulations and widen their pitch accordingly. However to do that they would face one distinct long green obstacle. Could they still be the hedgemen even without their hedge? And more importantly when are Brechin really likely to challenge for a UEFA Cup spot?