Captain Slog

Its probably Bobby Moore's fault. When England's only World Cup winning captain passed away in 1993 many people bemoaned the lack of support Moore had received from the game in the latter stages of his life. After marriage troubles and failed business ventures Moore approached the end of his life penning columns for the Sunday Sport, rather than working in the game he had excelled at. The upshot of this is of course overdue, and sadly post-humous praise for Moore and a disappointing legacy that means England captains from the 1990s onwards have been unashamedly fawned over by the media. You see, just because Moore was a great footballing hero, a role model before the phrase had even come into existence, does not mean that every England captain will be.

Step forward the current incumbent; ladies and gentlemen I give you Mr John Terry. Even despite the continued existence of Neil Warnock, Ken Bates and Peter Kenyon John Terry continues to get my goat at unprecedented levels. The main cause of my distaste of John Terry is only partially his fault as well, as it is centred on the two John Terry's we are presented with; the immaculate heroic England captain we read about in the press, and the witless thug he actually is. Whilst other players are gleefully singled out for their misdemeanours by the national press, Terry's past failings are swept under the carpet, brushed under the sofa, and stuffed in the nearest plant-pot.

Terry's less celebrated history includes a nightclub brawl, and then the drunken hassling of American tourists in an airport bar in the immediate aftermath of the September 11th attacks. He managed to land a hefty stud or six on a Bayern Munich player during a European tie and he retains a handy knack of being the first on the scene to ensure any opportunity for unnecessary light fisticuffs and general footballer chest shoving is taken; like the annoying girlfriend in a pub argument who helpfully yells "Are you gonna stand for that Gaz?" just as folk are returning to their pints. Pleasingly this tendency to whip up a drama out of a non-crisis has this year begun to backfire, as Didier Drogba's sending off in the Champions League Final shows.

The most irritating thing about all of John Terry's misdemeanours though is the fact that he has begun to believe the hype of a fawning media, and so he too now expects to get away with anything he does. In September Terry received his first ever straight red card for hauling down Manchester City's Jo, the card was duly rescinded... how dare Mark Halsey dismiss the England captain. On Monday Phil Dowd also showed John Terry a red card, after the defender had clattered through Leon Osman in the first half of Chelsea's match at Goodison Park. A terrible challenge and yet JT still perfected a jarring look of absolute incredulity as Mr Dowd brandished the red card.

Perhaps even worse than Terry's horror at being dismissed for a terrible foul was the subsequent press coverage. John Edwards of the Daily Mail was the worst culprit, claiming that Terry had been "on the wrong end of [Phil] Dowd’s occasionally erratic officiating". Edwards also suggested that "the inevitable response from home fans and the current climate of such challenges incurring the wrath of the authorities" were the reason for Terry's red card. Would it be so hard to just suggest that Terry had made a poor challenge and been suitably punished instead of making preposterous justifications of a high and late challenge that includes the phrase "for all the absense of malice". And on the same subject, a special mention is reserved for Matt Hughes of The Times who had the gall to use the phrase "although out of character" when referring to the challenge.

Of course JT is simply following a precedent laid down by Alan Shearer. The Match of the Day sofa dweller scored a lot of goals for England, he scored a lot of goals for Newcastle and Blackburn too, but he also got away with a lot as well. In 1998 he was seen on television kicking Neil Lennon in the head and charged with misconduct by the FA, although the subsequent hearing cleared Shearer of all charges. Graham Kelly later claimed that Shearer had threatened to withdraw from the 1998 World Cup squad if found guilty although Shearer claims this is not true. Disappointingly, but predictably, the media by and large decided to accept Shearer's account of events and so this spat went no further. Had it been we could have been faced with the spectre of an argument so dull and monotone that its collected tedium would have broken the space time continuum.