[usa24] dallas - toronto

Downstairs in the reception of the Super 8 Motel, Irving, there is a huge screen TV which takes up all of the right hand wall with the exception of a small sapce in one corner which is occupied by a worryingly murky fishtank, that may or may not contain any fish at all. From a sofa, all of five feet away from the screen two Spanish speaking Mexican guys are watching a life size Kate Winslett in Titanic... in English... even though they have the remote. I reluctantly choose to say nothing and instead slump into the seat by the door and pass the wait for the shuttle bus by staring intently at the fishtank in search of movement.

"Oh you're from England; we love Tony Blair," says the woman at the Air Canada check in without a hint of sarcasm. My flight is delayed, giving me ample time to wander round the departure lounge and confuse the staff of both a newsagent and a Starbucks with my accent. Once on the plane I find myself surrounded by businessmen attempting to 'out-technology' one another with a variety of Blackberrys, Apples and other fruit based media devices, which they are all reluctant to turn off despite several requests from the cabin crew. Send one last email or die when the plane fails to take off? Surely it can't be that hard a decision.

Arriving in Toronto it becomes clear that it is much easier to leave the 'Land of the Free' than it is to enter. No questions asked, minimal forms completed one shuttle bus journey and Sam is no longer your Uncle. The downside of taking the cheap flight home via Canada is getting hungry, getting in line with a tasty snack and then just before you get to the till, realising that you don't possess any legal tender for this country. Eventually I withdraw enough Canadian dollars for a sandwich and a coffee and collapse into a departure lounge seat near two kids and their father. "Can we go to Blackpool while we're over there?" asks one child; if only the British tourist board knew the Canadian appeal of the Lancashire Vegas.